A few words
Why We Are Here
History
Our story starts with the birth of a child...
A child was born to happy, loving parents. The child got a little older. They weren’t always happy, but they thought life was . Then one day, seemingly overnight, it fell apart into a war zone. Gone were the days of being taken care of; instead the child balanced on a precarious tightrope as they became the parent, the mediator, the therapist, the messenger, the pawn- all in a desperate attempt to appease their guardians. Thanks to the adversary nature of the current system, their guardians had become harmful. They argued and argued, at times becoming infantile, toxic, deficient. In the process, they stripped the kid of their childhood until it was too late. By the time the child had a semblance of a voice, they were now a teenager. And they had enough.
Overburdened with having to be more mature than the actual adults without being treated as one, and believing in the utter hopelessness of their situation, the miserable child took their own life. Yet even while standing over their own child’s grave, the parents still blamed each other. The child’s friends knew the truth – that the reason this horrible tragedy occurred was because of broken parents, and an even more broken system.
...and continues forward with a Child's dream for a better future.
Children are more than pawns, cash cows, (emotional) punching bags, therapists, afterthoughts, and property.
Children are more than pawns, cash cows, (emotional) punching bags, therapists, afterthoughts, and property.
We at Sage Lantern know this story is too real and too common. While not every case ends in such tragedy, as our system stands today we are failing our children, our families, and our society. Our current child custody system disrupts family relationships, creates undue financial burdens, incentivizes hostility, and enables abusers to cheat the system, and abuse to go unchecked.
And is it any wonder in a system that fundamentally treats children as something to be fought over, rather than one that encourages, even insists, that family should come together to work on a future that is beneficial for all? Blended families are still families. We want to support families, not lawyers and courts.
We believe our children, and our families, can have better.
Recognizing that emotional and verbal abuse is abuse.
Courts are Not the Answer, but the Last Resort
When parents are in a happy, healthy, and loving
co-parenting relationship – even when they are living in separate homes- the child feels loved, safe, and secure. But it is often difficult and confusing for parents to find a way to reach a peaceful resolution– and too easy for them to simply fight it out in courts.
This has resulted in courts and judges that are overwhelmed, with little ability to connect to any individual case. There were 110,000 open family court cases, as of Sept 2021. There is a crisis. We believe we need to restructure and simplify the system so that decisions can be made in the best interest of our children and families. After all, the family is who must live with the decisions.
Help us help our children and families!
Believing the 6th Amendment to the US Constitution must be paramount to all, whether a child or adult.
Our Children, Our Families, and Our Dignity.
What happens to the children? Should children have a chance to live their best lives with dignity and respect? Should they have the chance to escape a volatile or abusive situation? Instead of being told it’s “not so bad.” It’s not so bad…to the ones not living it. But the child may see it differently.
What happens when the child becomes unwilling prey caught between battling parents’ lawyers? Lawyers who have no incentive to help, and, worse, an incentive to increase their legal fees? Judges and lawyers simply walk away from the fallout from their arguments – never even bothering to check in with the children to see what they did to them. But the children, the families? They live with the consequences.
Do we believe we can do better?
No family should be torn apart without a chance. No child should have their entire life decided without any say. A child should understand their own rights; they should be put in a position where they feel safe, secure, and seen; and if their lives are determined by a legal system, they ought to have legal representation.
We believe in changing this current culture of enablement through:
Goals
- Standardize and improve custody laws state by state to prioritize families and children, while mitigating the impact of parental conflict on children
- Ensure that children of divorce have a voice to determine their own futures
- Promote quality guardians ad litem & mediators
- Tighten safeguards against child abuse through education and awareness
